Tales by Titles

There is really an exceptional amount of information to cover- lets face it. together. Usually, when this is the case, I am famous (Ok, just with kristin and chad) for a well-timed haiku. You should probably not get your hopes up for reading one right now. i tell you of my talents (ha!) so that you will understand my excitement for what is about to take place... rather than a haiku- a story of the last few weeks by way of story titles.

if you are still reading... i know you are a faithful.

shall we start? ahem....

Its time for the story of the broken computer accessory in the scary land of "Toshiba and the Service- Challenged Monster". This tale involves a monster who does nothing but finds time to spout banal and impotent phrases such as, "I'd be twice as upset as you, ma'am, if it were me" and the popular, "It will be there in 24 to 48 hours". (kind of like when you're on a hike and everyone passing you, heading downhill, tells you it is only 20 minutes further.) The service- challenged monster threatens to try the patience and blood pressure of innocent, warranty- clad commoners. Lord help ya if you are one of the commoners and expect to be protected in the land of Toshiba. NAY! the land of Toshiba is full of workers who kick puppies and tie knots in shoe laces... on purpose. In the inspirational tale, one commoner, named Nelley, manages to break free from wasted hours of deadly "conversation" with the workers and insists on freedom albeit through an AC adapter. It turns out, freedom is still freedom... no matter its vehicle.

Next, we visit the children's story entitled,"Mommy, can I Marry Michael Phelps?" What child (and by child, i mean 28 and 3/4 year olds) doesn't dream of marrying the delicious world record shattering, swimming phenom of an American golden child? In this tale, there are stories of Olympics victories and defeats. (Poor Shawn. Silver is still good...you're gold in my book.) There are many tears shed while details of awards ceremonies are shared and, most of all, there are squeals of joy as athletes meet and surpass their goals. God Bless America and GO USA! There is, obviously, an insert to the book including details of local celebrations across America... such as an "8.08.08" party (complete with a torch and man-Speedo) that took place in Nashville.

In the midst of record high heat, we find solace in the story entitled, "When Vacation Comes to You". The heroine of this story finds herself anchored to her lovely home all summer while others visit exotic locations like... Milwaukee. So, our heroine.. shelley, enjoys a timely visit by child hood friends! Sisters, Nicole and Ryan supply the convertible and fun excitement while Shelley provides the tours and "satanic lemonade" (care of bill and elizabeth, naturally.) A good time is had by all and Shelley dreams of next year where the sequel will be written, "You Ain't Really Livin til You're at a Honkey Tonk".

Finally, we happen upon the soon-to-be classic, "What Else Can Break?" A famous "last phrase" in its own rite, WECB is a novella. Small and humorous. it has to be. To start the tale, the main character, Telley, finds herself floating in a sea of broken amenities. For example, she attempts to use her computer-broken, oh well... she'll just continue getting ready for the day- straightener dies. fine. She'll finish taking pictures... nope. camera's broken. never mind, she'll call her sister... maybe next time. her phone charger bites the dust. hey, she's still got her music... until her Ipod croaks. As Telley starts to feel she has the opposite of the Midas Touch, she gains perspective. She's still considered a kabillionaire compared to a vast majority of the world and, perhaps, she should remember that. Telley lives happily ever after. (Especially after her computer works again!)

ok, nerdy story time is over.

I am awfully glad to be back in the land of blogging and look forward to sharing the er'ry day with you once again. Today's excitement includes a 2nd interview with a great company i'd be thrilled to work for. stay tuned!

peace.